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Forgiveness: What Does It Really Mean?

The true art of forgiveness is a complicated web of information and experiences that few truly know how to authentically participate in.

Yet, we feel compelled to forgive, as if not doing so makes us a lesser person. It’s been my personal and professional experience that when we feel wronged by another, no matter how ordinary or tragic the situation may have been, the person who requires (and actually craves) forgiveness, first and foremost, is our self. Yet, that thought rarely enters our minds. Instead, we typically project our anger and hurt feelings outward towards the other person.

Even when the most innocent of us have been harmed, we still, and rather unconsciously, blame ourselves. You might be asking yourself right about now, “Why would I blame myself for the other person’s misguided actions?” The answer is simple. Deep inside of us is a very aware and wise being who knows the truth about most conditions. Even if our mind chooses to tell us a different story, the wisdom within each of us always knows, or at least suspects, the potential ill will from the other person. Our wisdom, though present in every situation, may remain silent due to our inability to quiet our busy minds, especially when we feel threatened. It’s the burying of this sense that creates self-blame.

In order to enter into the freeing art of forgiveness, we must begin from within. Even if you are certain that you harbor no responsibility or self-blame regarding the circumstances that make your mind go wheezy with crazy emotions. Take a few moments each day and tell yourself that you know you did the best you could regarding the hurtful situation. Remind yourself what a precious and wonderful person you are. This act of self-kindness will assist you in releasing any misguided blame. Once the internal blame is lessened, then, and only then, can we truly forgive another.

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The situation, whether it appears personal or a public matter, really is not about you. Your soul is constantly looking for an opening into your mind where you might learn to surrender. This is because letting go is one of …